i'm building castles in the sky again.
and i know it, but i can't stop.
i want to.
and i want them to settle slowly down to earth.
in fact what i really want is my future to settle.
i want to know the best decisions.
i want to have a plan and have peace about it.
i want what everyone wants and i want it handed to me on a silver platter.
that sounds about right. doesn't it?
do i try and reconect with my family?
or do i slip into subee's?
do i stay here where the possibilities are endless
or do i try to ferret out and snatch the one way to get my education payed for in colorado?
do i take the job jill's practically offered me and soon start grad school
or do i look for a less professional one where i'll have family around the corner?
life is so complicated. and i do feel alone. i want to walk away into a rosy sunset but barring that possibility i don't know what my next best preference is... i just don't know what i want and need.
except for my castles in the sky.
